Everyone always has something going on in their lives. Whether its visible or the person is just holding it all in, but still there is something there just waiting to bust out and be like "Hey I am right fucking here?!?!?! Look at me, Look at me!" almost like a small child begging for attention. That's why my philosophy is do not judge anyone by their appearance. Get to talking to people, learn about that person, and then make your judgements about them. Growing up in southern Indiana you hear the phrase "Don't judge a book by its cover", and I have drove that into my thick skull.
Over the past year my appearance has completely changed due to a genetic gum disease that I got from my biological mother. Isn't life a bitch? You're twenty-two and gorgeous and all of a sudden you're teeth start just falling out. Everyone looks at me like I am scum of the earth now, and all on account of my teeth. I haven't even told my friends from High School whats going on because they just wouldn't get it. I'm the college drop-out and rebel friend that stayed in her college town where she fell in love with a local man. I chose to live paycheck to paycheck, live in my own house, have my cat Bruce as my best friend, and not live at home for my Mommy and Daddy to take care of me.
After committing three years to University I should have a degree, but one day while I was sitting in class, while my fluent French professor who is teaching me college level Algebra (Yeah i typed that right. My Prof is a French man with a horrible accent teaching math.) I can hardly understand what in the world he is droning on and on about, when the thought occurs to me "Kandace why the fuck are you sitting here listening to this fuck when France and this college town is all that he knows? Kandace what do you even want to do with your life since teaching jobs are non-existent these days? You are just wasting time and money." At that very moment I felt like I was going to have a panic attack sitting right there at my computer desk. What did I want to do with my life? Where did I see myself in five years down the road? Answer was I didn't see myself anywhere. My future was a black abyss filled with nothing and more nothing. Basically even now that's how it looks. Five years ago in high school I would have told you that today I would be a teacher or a English Professor at some prestigious college on the east coast. Instead I'm sitting here in my pj's, covered up in my SOA blanket, chatting up my Pops on Facebook. Oh how life can surprise you.
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